WHY I DANCE
Today is the last day of week 6 at CCDS (pre-professional education).
We have been busy preparing "Waltzing Bodies" for the upcoming Copenhagen Culture Night performance in the old Power Station of Carlsberg.
After a long day of technique class and rehearsing, back in the changing room, I could still smell the residue of the oil in the machine and the dust on the marble floor of the Power Station in my hair. I looked down at my bruised knees, shoulders, hands and feet, feeling amused by thinking of the song “I Bruise Easily" from Natasha Bedingfield. I asked myself once again what the hell I decided to step into "Dance" at such an unusual age?
Is it to fulfill my emotional needs or my physical needs? Or perhaps both? Or it rather depends on the day!
Or maybe I just want to talk.
TALK? Talk to whom? Talk about what?
Since when did I start to care about words?
I thought that I was the “leave me alone” kind of girl.
Should I wait for a response from God knows where?
Well, actually I am scared of the interaction? Then I guess the next
logical thing to do would be running away, run as fast as I possibly can!
with my eyes shut and ears closed!
Maybe not with my eyes shut, otherwise I would loose the direction and trip and fall!
Oh, no, that's my worst nightmare! – TO FALL
I could fall into a black hole.
But if I really think about it, is it so bad to fall into a black hole?
No, it can't be that bad! One thing I know for sure is that I would enjoy
the total silence in there!
BLACK = SILENCE, is it a physical equation?
Is there a hard surface at the bottom of the black hole?
If yes, then it would break my tailbone; then I won’t be able to dance for
a few weeks; then I will be devastated and will feel trapped alone in the
dark and the hopelessness would kill me.
But wait, honestly I can hardly imagine that I am the only person in the
building of Dancehallene/Vestebro/Copenhagen/Danmark/Europe/Earth who forgot to keep her eyes open while running away from things.
If we all run at the same time and from the same place towards the same direction with eyes wide open, we could create a strong gravitational field, stronger than the black hole!
Watch Out! The black hole is rolling towards US!
My heart skipped a beat, did yours too?
I tripped and fell.
No matter where the force comes from and what that force is, with or
without my eyes open,
I still tripped and fell and I still got bruises on my body,
and I am still feeling hurt!
Ehnnnnnnn, I just felt a tingling in my right finger tips!
I guess I just danced!
Dance for me is a trajectory of a journey. It provides me with a path to
understand and interact with myself and with my surroundings physically, emotionally, realistically and imaginatively. Inspiration and curiosity keep me grounded. Without dance, I would be LOST with eyes shut and with numbed fingers and toes.
- Amanda Xue Hai